New Challenge

Okay, so I was a day shy of making it a week with my Diary blog entries. It was fun (for me) while it lasted.

Now I'm on to a new challenge. Team Sarcoma Week started on Saturday and as a member of ABC Survivors I'm posting replies to the challenges every day for the week. One of the challenges asked us to write about how Sarcoma changed our lives. I thought it was a good question and decided to post my response here as well:

I’m amazed I can still bike, dance, do yoga. And every time I do it’s more than exercise--it's a celebration--because there was a very real chance I wouldn’t be able to do any of that again.

On the flip side, every morning I awkwardly walk down the stairs holding tightly to the railing and wonder how it is that I still can’t do this very simple action with grace. Two months before every check up I start having anxiety attacks and can't get to sleep. I'm too close of friends with my ice machine and bottle of Advil. I don’t like having senior citizens breezily hike past me. I wish I could run (even when I’m not being chased).

But those are only the physical differences. Surviving gave me totally new perspective. I still fall into old mental and emotional habits, sure, but the layers are different. They don't have as much power. The important things are...more important now. I’m a survivor now and that strength and knowledge and connection is carried with me in everything I do.